Monday Love to who you’re becoming and shout out to special population’s special teacher!

Despite the fact that we’re often urged on by our friends and family, or find ourselves listening to the pop-culture advice to ’stick to it’, sometimes cutting bait and walking away is the smart thing to do. It can be incredibly liberating to finally turn your back on something, acknowledge your losses and make the big shift. It’s called growing up. Or as you see so often on clever social media profiles, “attending the School of Hard Knocks.”

The litmus test for the big card game of life is knowing “when to hold ‘em and when to fold ‘em.” The winning players double down at the lucky table and never look back, while the amateurs and dilettantes second guess themselves and chase every shiny new object that comes along. Or worse yet, stay mired on the wrong track for years, (a lifetime?) due to some errant ‘should’ that got lodged in their psyche early on.

We’re all born with this mysterious thing called a soul, and the process of ‘becoming’ isn’t about searching endlessly outside ourselves until we finally discover who we want that soul to be. It’s about discarding the false promises and saying no to the ‘shoulds’ until we finally admit to ourselves who we really are at the center and get out of our own way. And don’t take it personally when you bite the dust and hit bottom. No one starts at the top and stays there the whole way. How can you ever be a hero if your journey has no twists and turns?

For most of my life, I’ve known I am a writer, an artist, and a DJ. And I’ve spent a lot of years making excuses and running away. But now, every day I get better at what I do because I’ve finally learned that simply making a habit out of it and perfecting my craft is the key to being a professional.

This weekly newsletter exercise is a case in point, it’s gotten so easy to write this much for you every Monday that I’m now devoting equal time on the other weekdays to the bigger goals of my book projects. My ideal working day consists of writing until lunch, and doing metalwork and sculpture until dinner, and spinning records at night, (with a few breaks in between for clients and business meetings). Thankfully, I’m getting there!

The reason I bring this up today is to help put your life in the context of community. Groups, businesses, and organizations have a metaphysical life of their own, where the whole is often greater than the sum of the parts. Every entity is comprised of individuals who may or may not be part of the greater journey depending on personal choice and circumstance. You may feel like you’re indispensable to your collective, but really you’re like a spoon standing in a glass of water. If you take yourself out, the water will fill your space in no time at all.

You may be part of something that was well established long before you came along, and will continue well after your time is up. When it’s your turn to carry the torch in the relay race, make sure you’re giving it your best shot. If the larger vision of the group is in line with who you are and who you’re becoming, then it’s time well spent.

Last night I danced at Barefoot Boogie’s 34th anniversary party in Berkeley. They trace their beginnings back to 1983, when the dance was held in a loft above the corner of 24th and Mission in San Francisco. In 1986 I was a transient punk-rocker and would-be artist with very bad habits, fresh from the underground scene in Denver. I recall looking up at the people dancing through the windows and wondering “What the heck is going on up there?” but never climbing the stairs. It took me another ten years or so to discover booze-free barefoot dancing, starting with the Unconditional Dance at Harbin Hot Springs.

Barefoot Boogie on Sunday evenings is more or less the sister event to Dance Jam, which I now manage on Friday nights. We use different studios across the hall from one another in the Sawtooth Building and share many of the same dancers and volunteers. The exact birthdate of Dance Jam seems to be lost in the fog, most of the old-timers recollect that it got going in 1976 or ’77 which means that we are celebrating 40 years in motion, bouncing between several different venues and management teams over that time span. Quite an achievement for anyone who remembers the Bi-Centennial, Jimmy Carter, or the birth of Disco and Punk!

So what are these dances, really? Are they just entertainment, or fun places to hang out and socialize? Well, yes to both, but I also believe that they are so much more. There’s something about these containers that nourishes the community in a unique way. Something important and ineffable that keeps the crew showing up week after week and the volunteers pulling their weight time and time again.

I think that these kind of dance floors, where you are encouraged to open up and move on your own terms, free from invasion by other people’s agendas, are the ideal place to ask yourself the big questions. Or rather cease the incessant questioning of your mind and allow the answers you seek to bubble up from your body.

In other words, they are crucial community crucibles for personal transformation. I quoted the coach Christian Mickelsen at the top of this article, because I really believe what he says is true. You’ve got to keep doing the work on yourself, and that’s the one job you will never finish. You may have to give up on one thing in order to move forward on another, but you can never give up on yourself. Having a safe space where you can dive into your deepest self and do the work when you need to is like secret sauce for your soul.

Let’s give thanks for the dance keepers among us and celebrate the connections that support us as we clear our minds and move forward with love. Your soul is right there waiting for you, ready to welcome you to who you really are.

Much love and happy motion until next week!