This week’s Dance First Member Insight is from Cocréa!

Fear is Safe.

Unraveling the paradox our mind can’t believe through listening to the body.

Hello Winter. Hello darkness. The old familiar, fertile ground from which we draw our sustenance.

In his Gene Keys contemplations, The 64 Ways, Richard Rudd, delivers this nugget, “Fear is safe.”

What a head job, hey? How does one take this paradox and apply it to one’s life?

Cocréa certainly invites us into a deep examination and exploration of our triggers, wounding, and trauma relating to others and ourselves. The fear that resides in becoming more connected and intimate is their opposites: rejection, abandonment, inadequacy.

I dance with these places in myself in my practice; I sit with them in contemplation; I talk through them with my partner; we make love with them.

Though I want to believe my fears are safe, that really hasn’t felt integrated as truth.

Until my birthday weekend last month.

My sweet partner, Valora, introduced me to a teacher whom we’ve been reading for over a year now. Richard Moss (what is it with teachers named Richard?) is an MD who had an awakening to the healing energy of unconditional love back in the 70s. He started healing people spontaneously through laying on of hands and has spent the last 50 years doing deep group work around the embodiment of this wisdom.

He just so happened to move to North Carolina recently, where we have also relocated.

For my birthday, Valora and I went to sit with him for the weekend. So, writing out some other words of Rudd’s, TRUST EVERYTHING, and taping them to my dashboard, we set out to see what tools might be learned to embody unconditional love and to see how we might allow fear to be safe.

The ripples over the last month have been profound.

Perhaps the biggest takeaway is this:

The fundamental ground of being is sensation.

We are the relationship we are having with ourselves in any moment, and we find that relationship by touching our sensations.

When we attach a thought to those sensations, we begin to form a relationship. So it is essential to choose a good thought.

The relationship you form to the sensations you experience IS the practice.

“If the thought creates stress or divides you from your reality, don’t believe you’re thinking.”
-Richard Moss

Receiving this teaching helped me contextualize my work with Cocréa more than any single teaching I’ve ever received.

When we are dancing with each other, we are in a sea of sensation. When we move with awareness of sensations that arise in the moment through the Invitation Circle (Inviting, Allowing, Acclimating, and Relaxing), we allow ourselves the opportunity to form a different relationship with our fear, with our anxiety, with all of the parts of ourselves.

Try this: the next time you feel the sensation you know as fear, can you INVITE a pause in your experience? And in that pause, can you breathe space in between the sensation and the mind wanting to attach “fear” to that sensation?

Then allow it to be as it is.

Let the feeling permeate the moment. Perhaps you want to make allowance for a different thought to be there. Can you acclimate to having a different relationship to that sensation than the first one that automatically leaped up?

Now see if you can relax into that space around the sensation.

Breathe.

It is almost never as dire of a situation as our fearful mind wants us to believe.

When we create this space, we relax the contracted “me self system” that has been holding around the trauma to protect us.

That is the birthplace of the fear that we must touch.

When we shape a movement and touch-based container focused on paying attention to sensation, where each person is attuning to the intention of being of service to each other person’s highest becoming, we harness immense power to create a space that is highly efficient at generating profound healing and transformation.

We create a space where our fear can be safe to be felt.

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