When is a habit more than a habit? What makes an everyday activity rise above the daily routine? Why is presence such a big factor in creating the sublime?

In other words, today’s meditation on your daily dance of life is all about ritual. I’m using that term in the loosest and most informal way; e.g. when you bring an elevated sense of intention and presence to some activity that might otherwise pass mindlessly.

Rituals in the strictest sense are often extremely precise and formalized. Think churches, courtrooms, graduations. But a handshake is a ritual. So is a hug.

In Europe the touching of cheeks in greeting can be very specific. In some regions the custom is twice, some places even three, while others get by with just a single pair of pecks. Greet someone who is used to a pair of bisous on the cheeks with a big California-hippy-style hug and they’re in for a big surprise.

How people handle mealtimes and food is endlessly fascinating to me. Of all of our human routines, eating is likely the least optional. So the degree to which different culture elevate their taking of sustenance is very interesting to say the least.

Growing up American, I’m well acquainted with our leadership in the art of ‘fast-food’. In the land of the drive-thru, it’s nothing out of the ordinary to see folks driving with a burger in one hand and a drink in the other, (and yes, steering with their knee.)

My view is that food is far too important to be taken for granted. When we put our personal presence into its preparation and add some intentionality to its role as a connective force, we gain more than just nutrition from our interaction with it.

For going on five years now, my domestic life has been joyously partnered with French culture. One foot in each world, so to speak. So when I ran across this pair of statistics recently it made me ponder the difference.

First, of all the countries in Europe, people in France spend the longest amount of time per day eating. Second, in all of Europe, France has the lowest obesity rate.

So what does that tell us? Well, I leave you to draw your own conclusions, but I will say this. It comes naturally to my extended family here in France to come together as an intergenerational group and pitch in on preparing the table and meal. Each course flows in a leisurely manner with much conversation, from aperitif to salad and entree to main dish, and on to fromage, dessert, and tisane or coffee.

There is a sequence and a pace and an appreciation that deserves the word ritual. It’s informal and flexible, yet comfortably predictable. A quick lunch may run only an hour and a half, while holiday dinners can easily last four or five.

The upshot of elevating meals to the level of ritual is that a deeper feeling of connection is guaranteed. I feel sad for some family friends in California who have a well-stocked kitchen yet eat at random or on the run — they admit that the only time the parents and the three kids sit down together at the table is Christmas and Thanksgiving.

You can apply the ritual mindset of a leisurely French meal to almost anything that you practice. Allow yourself the time to be intentional. Be present with what you are doing to make room for gratitude and appreciation. Look for opportunities to connect. Notice what makes it special.

If wearing your favorite t-shirt is what gets you out the door to dance, then let that be your uniform and wear it til it tatters. If you see it as your ritual, then that’s what counts.

À bientôt!

M+

Mark Metz
Director of the Dance First Association
Publisher of Conscious Dancer Magazine